After a long and hard campaign punctuated with vicious attacks from the Canine party, Barack Obama has won the race for the Davis-Ayala pet. It ends a truly rags to riches tale that is quintessentially American. At many times during the campaign season there were serious doubts as to whether or not the Feline party could mount a serious challenge to the dominance of the Canine party. The Canines had enjoyed dominance in the pet landscape of the Davises for almost two decades, and never had there been a black feline pet. But his campaign based mainly on pity captured the hearts of many independents. And in a last minute crossover vote, Michael cast the deciding ballot in favor of the feline. Explaining his vote, Michael simply said “I couldn’t let the little bugger starve.” In his acceptance speech, Barack was characteristically eloquent and brief, saying very simply “meow.” He then returned to his victory feast of Whiskas Tuna Dinner. Transition plans are being drawn up now, which include a trip to the veterinarian and house training. Despite this early victory, the canine party insists that Barack will someday have to share power. But for now, the little fellow can sleep a little easier.
Written by Michael Davis
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